Red Sox vs. Apple

I was sitting on a bench at Redmond Town Center last night and I saw a most disturbing thing… a Red Sox fan. Now, now, relax – there’s a reason for me point it out. In fact, I think it helped me realize something about why I currently dislike both Red Sox fans and Apple fans…

My biggest gripe with Apple over the last couple of years hasn’t been with their products. Nor their software. Granted, I did try a PowerBook that got hot enough to heat a small village… and once I realized that I would be working more, just to use an OS-X box, I Switched Back to Windows from OS-X… [yes, that was indeed the case: for two months I did nothing but lurk for shareware/freeware, tweak drivers, fight with printer connections and delved into UNIX – I realized that since Win2000, I hadn’t had to do that with a PC… I just used a PC to do something and I couldn’t just use the Mac – it felt like it required attention.]

Anyway, aside from the above babble, I like the majority of their products: a legacy of Apple bags in my den speak to that end. Yet, I’ve had a stone in my shoe with them – and some of their fans – for a while now because of how they constantly position themselves… It’s never “Apple Has Done This!” as a press release. It’s always “Apple Has Done This At Microsoft’s [insert something ugly here]!”. They preview Tiger: the signs they hung said more about what Redmond was doing than what Apple was doing. They bring out the Mac mini – at least four different shots at Microsoft during the keynote, even though Microsoft doesn’t make computers. You don’t see Ford taking a shot at BMW while their announcing their newest model, do you? They might think it, they might say it in interviews, but they would never take focus away from their product by mentioning a competitors… With Apple, it always seems like they aren’t able to announce or promote their products on their own.

How did I get to that conclusion? I’ve been there for a while. Long before I took a job in WA. Stuff like that just annoys me: you win in the something, take the accolades without taking someone else down.

How did I get to that conclusion yesterday? Like I said, I was sitting on a bench and I happened to look up to see a Red Sox fan wearing a green shirt that said “Boston Red Sox” on the front, walking with a friend that was wearing an M’s logo. Then I noticed the shamrock. I said, “Ah, St. Patrick’s Day…” I looked up and noticed he was wearing a black hat with a red B on it. Guess he was really a fan…

And that’s when I noticed his belt buckle. Oh, yes, there was a huge belt buckle on this kid. He was about 5’6″ – the buckle was about 5″ across and 3″ tall, in landscape orientation – it looked like a chest protector… I’m surprised it didn’t pull him over. Gaudy gold-plated metal? Brass hooters on the thing? Oh, no. Not in digitally influenced Redmond. No, his buckle was made out of a scrolling LED display. In red letters. Scrolling “Yankees Suck”.

Even though the Red Sox won the World Series last season, they can’t even enjoy it without being pissed off at the team that they beat in the ALCS… If you asked a Yankees fan in 2000 what they thought about the Sox, they’d said “Who cares? We won the series!” Ask them in 99, 98, 96, 78, 77, [etc.] and it would have been a similar response. Not the Sox fans. Oh, no, why be happy with a victory? Even one that took you from your rivals? I don’t think they deserve success. You can be sure that if they don’t do well this year that you’ll hear “At least we had ’04!” for decades to come… Some people just can’t handle success I guess…

Maybe Apple should sponsor Fenway Park.


7 thoughts on “Red Sox vs. Apple”

  1. Our local equivalent is the UW/WSU (Washington State Univ) rivalry. Cougs from Wazzu care WAY more about it than Husky fans for the most part.

    The belt buckle does sound kind of cool, tho. (Because of course they do) It opens up a lot of possibilities.

  2. Well that’s cuz the Cougs always offer a far superior team each year and consistent get screwed by bad ref calls and other global disasters. *smirk*

    By the way, you do know that at a particular UW-fan house you are required to step on a husky just to get in the house?

    [For the record, I have no allegiance to cougar nor husky (be it UW or UConn) but I do know well how to push buttons!]

  3. Actually, that’s more my advice to the Sox and Apple fans: get over it and move on, but they aren’t complying!

  4. I bought an old imac for 50 bucks, put OS 10.3 on it and have never, ever had one problem with it. If you feel the need to “tweak” your computers get a Linux box…Ubuntu is a good distro. Apple’s are for those of us who prefer not to fuck around with useless crap; read games and “tweaking”. As for me, I was able to redirect my leftover ‘worm and virus fixing’ energy into more profitable and pleasurable pursuits. I’m tan, well rested and the registry editor is but a faint, misty memory…Good Luck!

  5. Yo Randy listen to this joke:

    Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired of God, “Where have you been?”

    God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, “Look Michael, look what I’ve made.”

    Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, “What is it?”

    “It’s a planet,” replied God, “and I’ve put LIFE on it. I’m going to call it Earth and it’s going to be a great place of balance.”

    “Balance?” inquired Michael, still confused.

    God explained,pointing to different parts of Earth, “For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I’ve placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people,” God continued, pointing to different countries. “This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice.”

    The Archangel, impressed by Gods work,then pointed to a large land mass. “What’s that one?”

    “Ah,” said God. “That’s New York, the most glorious place on Earth. There’s beautiful lakes, rivers, the most marvelous city in the world, New York City. The people from New York City are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they’re going to be found traveling the world. They’ll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. I’m also going to give them a super-human, undefeatable baseball team who will be admired and feared by all who come across them.”

    Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed. “What about balance, God? You said there will be BALANCE!” God replied wisely. “Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I’m putting next to them in Boston.”


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