One of the things I find to be neat about being a registered independent is that you can’t really take any blame for the two candidates you end up with in November. In years past, I’ve felt this was a bad thing – that you’re left out of a process because you’ve opted not to be partisan – but this year, I’ll wear it as a badge of honor. In fact, I’m almost sorry that I registered to vote in WA, as irresponsible as that would have been.

Why?

First you’ve got Bush, who I thought handled 9/11 rather well, given the fucked up situation that it was. I also don’t believe that he was to blame for the attack, like a lot of anti-Bush people think… first off, the blame is on the sick people that attacked us. Beyond that, he wasn’t in office long enough to have made an impact, which makes me think that he was given a situation that was created by the prior President… Eight years is a long to to have ignored all things foreign, especially when you have to put out fires at home every other week.

And then came the War in Iraq, where I’m one of the few people that think it wasn’t a huge mess from start to finish. We were given information by our “trusted source” that they were a threat, so we acted. And unlike the MTV-warped citizen of the US, I don’t think that we should have went in for six weeks and said “Oops – our bad” and pull out. There’s no Do-Overs in a situation like this. We removed a tyrant and this leaves a vacuum – we can’t just leave it and say “whoops”. So, once committed, we have to stick it out.

No, my problem with Bush is that he almost seems to make himself look stupid in a lot of media situations. He’s never addressed the war in the manner I’ve described above… he keeps trying to prop himself up with an “Aw Shucks” I’m-just-a-country-boy persona. This doesn’t work, George. Consequently, he’s fuckin up and not selling himself as well as I think he should be. Case in point – take this quote that the press jumped on (and rightfully so, for a change!) from a recent speech: “They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” Nice fuckin’ job, doughboy.

Then add to that the constant pushing for religion in state affairs. I’m fine with him being a devote catholic. No issues at all with that. In fact, if he’s a devote anything I’d have no problem with it – passion adds depth to people, regardless of what it is they believe in. It’s his personal choice for him and his family, even if he wanted to be a devote agnostic and ignore all religion. However when all of your politic policies start to sound like biblical teachings, I have an issue with that. That’s letting your personal beliefs conflict with your job. If I was a Jehovah Witness and preached to people during company meetings, my ass would be on the street. It’s that simple. For an example, look at the gay marriage thing; he response is marriage is sacred and religious and blah, blah, blah. That’s not good enough, George. Hire me as your speech writer and at least I’d give you some concrete secular reasons to be against it (even though I’m personally fine with it, as it has no direct impact on me). At least I would know how to argue your battles.

And then there’s Kerry. Who has got his lips shoved up his party’s ass so far that he can taste mouthwash. And I know bush is a stout republican, but a lot of the GOP are pretty pissed off with him too these days – that shows he’s not acting strictly along party lines. Kerry on the other hand seems like a party puppet at times. The fact that he’s a democrat scares me… they have a habit over the last few decades of messing things up, and it’s usually not even the President’s fault – it’s all the party crazed people that get their hooks into the office, once they get elected. One thing I’m sure of is that Kerry has got waffling down to an art form and that worries me a good deal.

Take the “I want a debate on issues” yet comes out with a winning comment over the past week about how Bush didn’t behave responsibly during the attacks of 9/11. First off, what happened to no mudslinging? I mean if this is supposed to be consider an Issue, call me Diana, the Amazon Princess. The Convention was just last week, and you’ve flipped back already… why? Because he did it first? Hah! Nice – politics sinking to a first grade level. Let’s just call it what it is: there will be mudslinging at any time and get to slinging.

Whatever. Let’s look at the comment itself, which I’m told comes right out of Moore’s movie. Told? Yes – I haven’t gone to see it. I refuse to pay $8 to see a movie that will only piss me off because it’s a one sided piece of propaganda. If I wanted to be jerked off, I would not give $8 to someone that looks like Michael Moore. And if our would be President is going to turn to movies for speech material, we may as well go by way of Demolition Man and put Arnold in the White House now. But beyond that, what the hell is this guy thinking?

His comment was along the lines of “if I knew the country was under attack, I wouldn’t have hung out, reading kids a story”. Are you kidding me? Who the fuck are you to backseat quarterback, especially on something like this? This was something that none of us had ever lived through beofre, aside from Peral Habor over 60 years ago. Who’s to say how we would have reacted at that exact moment? Hindsight is always 20/20, and can never be trusted.

I was working 90 miles from Ground Zero. I was watching the live TV broadcasts via the ‘net. I got an IM from the Goat asking me what was going on, after the first plane hit the first tower. We both said “Whoa, that sucks – what an error.” The second jet told use we had a Problem. The third jet confirmed we were under attack. But by that time, Bush was already aboard Air Force One. The Veep was en route to a secure location. The aide that whispered in Bush’s ear, was for the second plane, where his face hardened – that look where I thought he was ready to take someone behind a woodshed for a whoopin’ – and he left the kids group just after that.

What would you have done differently Mr. Kerry? Drop yer pants and try to run for an exit? Picked up a kid and start to dance a jig? And what does any of this have to do with today’s election? Again, maybe you should hire me as a speech writer, so that you don’t look like an ass when you try to point out something like this. Instead of telling us how you might handle a crisis, you’ve instead shown us that you look like a confused teenager saying “it wasn’t me”.

I’ll be voting this November, but I don’t know who for this year… the pickings seem bleak and I’ve become a swing voter, the model of a true Independent. I take the responsibility of my citizenship very seriously: I won’t ever skip the polls come Election Day, but I’m not at all pleased that we have such a strong “which one sucks less” stuation developing this year.

And as my distant Chicago-based relatives have said before: “Vote early, and vote often.”