I’ve always believed I have a unique perspective of the world. I know there’s a whole huge world that surrounds me and I’m a proton that lives in an atom that’s on a dust mite that’s part of a dust bunny that sits on the smallest cog of the great machine known as Earth. Ok, that’s not entirely true – I’m more of an electron, as I have a mostly negative charge and I fancy myself to be in motion at all times, but you get the point. Anyway, I’ve found this to be a unique perspective among Americans my age. Most of my peers consider themselves to be the center of the universe, never mind that there’s other nations in the world besides America. This constant belief of one’s own importance is something that seems to be a common theme for us yanks – the only reason why I would distinguish myself is that I realize that there’s much, much more to the world besides America; I just don’t live there. There’s a point to this babble, trust me…
Having said the above, I usually find that my views are not the same as others, but I can still understand their position on things. I’ve always said I had a dualistic view on many things: I almost always see both sides to everything. Rather ironic for someone with a Ranting site, but it’s the truth. I choose my sides on most matters, after having investigated both sides of an argument; this is why I’m so “for or against” something yet have some empathy for the opposition. I know what the other side’s point is but I don’t agree with it! So, it is the extremely rare occasion that someone throws me for a loop. Ya know, something that makes me go “D’OH!” because I never saw it coming and never even thought of before. I guess it’s a good way to keep me interested in the world; I haven’t seen it all yet — close, though!
Now what you should be saying is “what made Randy go ‘D’OH!’ this time?” It’s nothing much really; just a little something I found online that is totally logical. It explains a whole “plan” for single women that have a lack of morals that are looking for cheap tawdry sex. This isn’t anything I could do, but having that dualistic view, I can see how it could work. I could see how it plays on the current state of the world, where nice men get kicked in the dick by women that have been played by other men.. There’s just no way I could do what this plan suggests; I’ll continued to get kicked in the dick and treat women well – that’s a lesson I’ve yet to unlearn. But ya gotta read this thing… it’s like a testosterone manifesto.
The Master Plan by Joseph M. Tiazzi
I’ve been around the block a few times. Well, at least enough to know that relationships suck. It seems no matter what you do, no matter how much you work at them; you always end up alone with a whole lot of frustration. You have some good times, you have some bad times, but regardless of how many of each you have something happens that throws you out on the street alone.
How can you survive? I mean if everyone tells you that love stinks and relationships suck, what can you do about it? Well, it all depends on what youre looking for in the first place. Did you stay with your woman and take all those long walks on beach just for the companionship? Probably not. Did you make all those trips to Pier One, Linens and Things, and Bed Bath & Beyond because you needed the soap dish that matched the fuzzy little bathroom rug? Of course not. And did you spend 45 minutes waiting outside of a dressing room answering questions about how two dresses looked when the only difference between them were the types of buttons? Most definitely not. And of course, the kicker: did you go and buy those pads with the wings because you thought they protected yourself better? Hell no.
So why do men do so many things for women when its painfully obvious that we would never do them on our own?
Sex.
Sex will warp a mans mind. It will in fact make him the most tamed and complacent being on this entire planet, if he gets enough sex. Even missing Monday night football wouldnt be such a bad thing, if women sexed their men enough. How often is enough? You can never get too much, so as much as possible is a good place to start. The problem? Women either dont seem to understand this or they feel they dont need to bother with this. If women gave their men a good dose of sex on a regular basis, without making their man beg for it, their relationships would be in a much healthier state of being. Would there be problems? Of course. However, their greatest weapon would be sex. A quickie in the afternoon would guarantee a full Saturday afternoon at the mall without any complaints from their man.
The problem? Women are difficult and fail to see the obvious solution. This means that we, the men of the world, need to take matters into our own hands. This spawns a lot of other problems. It makes us think about what we would want in an ideal relationship. Why wouldnt we? If we play the game by their rules, we lose. If we dont play the game at all, we lose. So maybe its time we play the game a little differently. You know the game; lets change the tempo.
How about this: a relationship based on sex that you would set the time and place of, be able to control how serious you wanted the relationship to be, and still have a lot of free time on your hands? Too good to be true? Of course not! This is what this Master Plan is all about. The good news is women will play along. The better news is that you dont have to change much to follow the plan.
The premise of the Master Plan: Women will always flock to, desire, chase, and jump at men that already are spoken for.
Dont believe me? Look in a bar on a Friday or Saturday night. Men are checking out women based on their looks. They are watching their body, their jewelry, their body, their face, their body, and their friends in the rare occasion that the woman in question would want a threesome. Women are looking at men as earning potential, how well they dress, how clean the look, how well they dance, how many drinks they are having, how they are looking at other women, how they treat their waitresses, and how often they touch their crotch. Ive done the studies and believe me on faith if you have to, but its 99.44% accurate. Men care about the physical plane. Women care about that in 5% of their evaluation; the rest is psychological and filed under Other. I could explain other, but as a guy, you wont understand it anyway. Theres absolutely no logic involved.
If, while you are reading this you think, Hey thats not the way I am! stop lying to yourself and to me. You are. You might not think you are. Hey, lets assume that you arent that way. Go get into a serious relationship with your heart and not your penis, have that relationship end and see how well you fit (or want to fit) this mold.
What can you do in this world? Lets agree that a purely sexual relationship is what you are after. So far, you know that women want men that are taken. The reasoning behind this is that if you are in a relationship, youre already trained. If you are married, another woman has done all of the work and made you into a responsible, nurturing, and caring soul mate. Besides, if you have someone, you must be worth something. Ive had one woman say to me upon pointing out that I wasnt physically handsome that you were engaged once, so you must be at least alright! No lie. It really happened.
Women will also chase what they cant have. This is also a fact. If youve ever been in a relationship for more than six months, youve lived this. You could say that the sky was purple and your woman would cry; if you said it was blue, youd be wrong. Theres no logic involved; women by nature tend to like to change their minds. If they see something they cant easily get, they want it all that more. Theres no science to explain it, but science has helped us to point it out.
Review: Women like men that are broken in and previously trained. Women like things that they cant have.
Hypothesis: Married men are the true and sure fire aphrodisiac to a womans bed.
Now before you throw this out or start calling me a liar, just hear me out with an open mind. With that open mind, remember that you are only after sex. If you want a serious meaningful relationship (in other words sex with someone to talk to and take to the movies) then theres another section for you, later in this document. First I will assume that you want nothing but sex from women, without the hassles of a relationship.
Preparing the Master Plan.
– Get a wedding band. This is easy and relatively cheap. There are a number of sites on the Internet for ordering wedding bands. They dont even have to be real gold, but be sure to get a decent one. A band that is turning green on your finger at the bars will not cut it! If you get a silver one, be sure to say that it is white gold or platinum when asked, and you got it to match her rings.
– Get a couple of well aged children. Cousins work best. They usually have some sort of resemblance, which is important. This is for when you go to pay for something; it adds to the mystique of your other life. You should shoot for kids that are between 4 and 6. Choose however many you want, but I would go for the standard 2. More than that makes you kind of old. Also, if the kids are younger than 4, you look like a whoring man that is neglecting his responsibility as a father. This doesnt help get you into the bed.
– Get your facts straight! This is an important KEY. Memorize the following: Kids names, ages, birthdays, wifes name, anniversary, birthday, maiden name, fake (or real) address, telephone number. All of these wont be needed on the first date with your new woman. They should be memorized in the effect that you keep an ongoing sexual relationship with your mistress. She will want to know these things some day in an effort to see why you arent leaving your wife. Its a vicious game to play, but its only card youve got to play, so make it count. The more you learn in the beginning, the more prepared you are in the future.
Thats it for prep work. Now, this plan is not a checklist type of deal. It is not 100% effective because you never know what type of women you will run into. This plan does not work for every type of women; it will only work on women that like the bad boy and men that are bad for them. The bright side of this is that 65% of the women out there, in the bars, fit that profile.
An example of the Master Plan:
– Put on the ring.
– Go to a bar.
– Approach a woman you find hot.
– When she asks about the ring, tell her that youve been on the outs with your wife for a while and nothing you do can seems to help matters much. Dont blame her for anything specific, but dont make it sound like shes mad at you for cheating.
– Go through the normal dating stuff. The Master Plan has gotten you through the door already, by making you seem more desirable by being taken.
– After the night, if you end up in bed or not, call her in about 3 days. This is the hook. She will think that youre all into her and that you have the good sense to call a woman because thats what they want.
– Meet her again at the bar the next week if all goes well and act on your best behavior.
This should keep going on for a long while. Never mention that you would divorce your wife, until a fight happens. Give her flowers or a gift if she gets mad enough to say, Its over until you leave your wife for good. Both of these will happen at least once. You know youre in good shape if she doesnt leave. If she does leave, start the plan again. If she doesnt, youve got your sexual relationship.
Bonuses:
– Limited socializing. In a regular relationship, you have to merge your male friends with your girlfriend. That doesnt have to happen anymore. Shes your mistress. She doesnt meet the parents, she doesnt meet anyone you know, and she doesnt get your home number. Give her the cell phone.
– No annoy phone calls. As part of the above, you can claim you had to turn off the cell phone because of a family party, etc.
– Convenient sex. Since you are married, you have limited time available to meet with your mistress. So if you want sex on the spur of the moment, you call your mistress and meet her somewhere. On a good run, this will be at her place, meaning that you dont have to get a hotel room. Either way, if she cant make it, thats one thing, but she will have to be at your beck and call all the time because you have limited time.
– More free time. It is amazing how much time you have to spend with your wife. Got plans on Friday with the guys? Just say that the wife is making you take her out. What can the mistress say? Anything that she says is out of your hands. Want to just stay at home and drink beer? One of the kids is suddenly sick and you have to stay home. Its easy to come up with excuses to get out of dates.
– Multiple women. With all of the extra free time you have, you can even see more than one mistress at a time. Just make sure you dont take them all to the same place; good doing women will tell one mistress about the other, if you keep flaunting them in the same restaurants.
– Saves money. No rings, no outlandish gifts, no annoying I love you balloons or stuff like that. The mistress will be happy with whatever you can part. The only downside is that youll probably lose money from buying condoms, which I firmly suggest using at all times (see the Downside section as to why).
Downside:
– The women that you will meet will be women that are happy to be with cheating men. Should you ever decide to marry one of them, I would definitely speak against it. These women are happy to cheat with you against another woman. What makes you think that they wont cheat on you with another man if you were in a serious relationship? Sex with you will not prevent this; take my word for it. You cannot change a cheater. Good thing is that you arent cheating on anyone in all of this.
– Possible guilt. Since youre lying your ass off, you might start to feel bad. Why should you? You dont have a wife. You arent cheating on anyone. The mistress that you are with seems content enough to help destroy a family. Granted that family doesnt exist, but what should that matter to you? The only sin you have on your head is that fact that youve been lying all this time, just to have sex. Its not that big a sin, compared to anything else thats going on.
Alternate:
This plan up till now has been all about getting a purely sexual relationship on a long term basis, using women that like to sleep with men that are unavailable. If you are looking for a one-night stand, I can say to you this: rebound. Keep the ring.
Thats about the whole of the Master Plan. The rest is being able to lie by the seat of your pants, in a bar environment. The Plan will get you in the door; it gives you a path to follow but it is not an absolute science. Therefore I suggest the following guidelines:
– Approach the women in a bar. Most women will not think to bother with you since you are married. If you hit on them, they will think you are open to the idea of an affair.
– Always act like a gentleman, when hitting on the ladies. This will help to enhance the belief that you are desirable and well trained by another women. Being a guy at this point is not a good thing.
– When you start to talk to a woman, dont make any attempts to hide the ring and dont flaunt it either. Just pretend it isnt there. When she asks you about it, tell her that you are having a long stretch of bad times and you just wanted to get out for a night to talk to people. Shell buy it because she wants to believe it.
– If a woman wont talk to you when she notices the ring, and you say youre still married, walk away. These women are not the kind that would have a purely sexual relationship. They would want the whole package of walks, talks, meaningful glances, and other annoying side effects to a sexual relationship. Let them go!
– When speaking of your wife, seem kind of annoyed but not really pissed off. It will show that youre a good husband to her and your mistress will want that kind of treatment.
– Dont be cheap. These women will go with you if they think that you will treat them well. They will stay with you if they think that the treatment will continue for a long period of time. In addition to that, they will be happy if they think that you will leave your wife.
– Charm. As corny as it is, give them all the lines they like. They are beautiful, in it for the love, the only one for me, blah blah blah. All of it; it will all work.
– Take the good with the bad. Eventually, your mistress will begin to get anxious about your wife. This is easily handled. Take some extra time out of that free time and spend it with your mistress. You can tell her that you told your wife you would be out of town on a conference or something. Cover your tracks is all, even though you dont have to. Also give the things are getting worse at home so you might split up for good speech. This will keep her waiting around for something to happen.
– Intrigue every now and again. Some time, usually when theres nothing on TV, give the mistress a call in the middle of the week. Tell her you want to meet her ASAP; you and the wife had a fight and you need to talk to someone you care about. Then meet the mistress this should turn into a sexual meeting, since youve told her that you care about her and that you want to see her. The fact that its on a moments notice is an added bonus and gives her that who on the sly anxiety that comes with sneaking around. Another perfect turn on to the type of women you would attract with this Plan.
Conclusion:
Sex. Its out there for the taking and this will help you take it on a regular basis without hurting anyone. I mean sure, the critics of this plan will say that you are hurting the mistress, but remember this. Shes dating and sleeping with a married guy. In her mind, shes breaking up a happy (or semi-happy) family with kids in most cases. Shes ok with this, right? Otherwise she wouldnt bother screwing the married man in the first place. She agreed to all of this, whether or not she wants to admit it. If anything, when either she gets bored of being the other woman, or if you get bored of this woman and you break it off, shes exonerated because there was no family to break up! The only thing that youve done wrong is use this woman for sex by lying to her for the entire stretch of the relationship. Can you live with that? If you can, this is for you.
This plan is not for everyone. Its for men that are disenchanted with playing the relationship game when all they want is to have sex in the first place. If you wanted to have a long lasting relationship or eventually get married, this is obviously not for you. It was only recently that I realized the secret to free sex in todays day and age, and I felt obligated to share it with as many men as possible. If only to level the dating playing field and give the guys the advantage for a change.
One thing I will advise on again is to use condoms at all times. Maybe this is just my own conscience at work, since this little document will hopefully change the world of dating for so many men, but I feel obligated to say this again. Use condoms! The women you will be attracting will NOT be good women in the biblical sense. If they sleep with you, they have slept with a number of other men before, in most cases. Some of them will probably have slept with married men, which increases the chances of STD and other funky things that Im quite certain you dont want. These are my two cents while Im on the soapbox. Just use the damned condoms.
Good luck and go with caution; there be dragons out there!